I am going to be in KICK ASSSS shape! Lately when I get frustrated or want to distract myself, I work out extra hard. I had a great work out this morning and mini sessions through out the day, it really helps me relieve stress.
I figured something out today, actually I think I already knew but just wouldn't admit it, I don't want to date Jake anymore. It makes me feel bad when I'm out with him, thinking of Jordan. My friends and I can tell that he really likes me, but I just don't feel it with him. Remembering an old blog about our hands, they do but not the right fit. My feelings for Jordan have never change, I just had to make myself cold to be strong and not break down. I could have easily done it, I was really broken, and I wasn't just "rebounding," I kind of liked Jake in the beginning, but the more I'm go out with him, the more I see that he's not who I want. He is nothing like Jordan, and I thought that was a good thing at first, I didn't just want someone "like" Jordan, I don't want a copy, I want my original nerd back. :( I miss him so much, and hopefully we can be together again someday, we both agree that we would like to try but not like this, things need to be different. I hope we can make it happen.
Monday, December 14, 2009
Saturday, December 12, 2009
FRUSTRATED!!!!! FREAKIN JAKE!
I have no freakin' idea, what to do right now!!! Grrrrrr!!!! Freakin' Jake! Sorry, but really need to vent right now, because I am just sooooooo frustrated with the way things are right now. I've been on the fence about Jake lately, I was talking to my friend Daniel the other, because he knows Jake. AAAAAAA, I told him that I'm not sure about Jake, the thing with Jake, is that I've been focusing on all the positive, I needed to, to keep myself positive. The thing is, everything is not so positive. AAAAAAAA, I can't hide the bad just because I don't want to face it, now I break my silence because I am so frustrated and confused!
Jake and I were suppose to over to his house today and watch an old movie together, maybe two, anyways, that was the plan for after he got out of work. I just talked to him a little while ago and nope. Apparently he didn't get a chance to "clean up," I know he's been busy, but I told him it would be alright with me, he got that annoying voice I haven't spoke of to anyone but Gabby before this point, it's almost like he's winning, "Aww, trust me, I want take you over, but my place is so dirty that it bothers me, I don't even want to see it like this." Ok, why does this annoy me so much, well like I said, first of all he gets that winey voice, not to mention he was the one that thought of this since about Tuesday, do you mean to tell me he couldn't clean up or at least make his place look decent sometime between then and now. He reminded me last night, and he was up late, off doing an interview of a band for the radio station, ok, fine, but after, he was up late into the morning hours, just messing out around the house because he didn't feel like sleeping. Ok, why didn't he clean or straighten up then? AAAAA...
It's bad enough for me that I'm trying to see if something could come out of this, he's a good guy and he's treated me right up to this point, but he's flaking again, we almost didn't go out the other night too, but he changed his mind and came to pick me up for a late date. I wanted to talk to him tonight, it was important, I've been talking to Jordan a friend again, and I didn't want to hide it from Jake, I also wanted to talk to him and let him know that I might not be here next semester, I'm waiting for my scholarship offers from OSU, I don't know what I'm going to do yet, I registered for my classes here just in case I do stay, but I'm not sure about him either. Dam it! I'm more mad about the fact that I didn't get tell him today, I thought it would be better to tell him in person, that's why I waited until tonight. There goes that plan. I'm so frustrated and confused where I'm almost ready to just call him and tell him just what I've been thinking!
The thing that's really getting to me is the fact that I told Jordan about all this already, I told him even though it's been complicated with Jake, he treats me right and he's there for me, this does not reflect the side of Jake I was talking about. I don't even know if I want to talk to him today or anymore, I still cold, I have to be, I might be frustrated, but I don't want to get hurt. This just suck to me!
Jake and I were suppose to over to his house today and watch an old movie together, maybe two, anyways, that was the plan for after he got out of work. I just talked to him a little while ago and nope. Apparently he didn't get a chance to "clean up," I know he's been busy, but I told him it would be alright with me, he got that annoying voice I haven't spoke of to anyone but Gabby before this point, it's almost like he's winning, "Aww, trust me, I want take you over, but my place is so dirty that it bothers me, I don't even want to see it like this." Ok, why does this annoy me so much, well like I said, first of all he gets that winey voice, not to mention he was the one that thought of this since about Tuesday, do you mean to tell me he couldn't clean up or at least make his place look decent sometime between then and now. He reminded me last night, and he was up late, off doing an interview of a band for the radio station, ok, fine, but after, he was up late into the morning hours, just messing out around the house because he didn't feel like sleeping. Ok, why didn't he clean or straighten up then? AAAAA...
It's bad enough for me that I'm trying to see if something could come out of this, he's a good guy and he's treated me right up to this point, but he's flaking again, we almost didn't go out the other night too, but he changed his mind and came to pick me up for a late date. I wanted to talk to him tonight, it was important, I've been talking to Jordan a friend again, and I didn't want to hide it from Jake, I also wanted to talk to him and let him know that I might not be here next semester, I'm waiting for my scholarship offers from OSU, I don't know what I'm going to do yet, I registered for my classes here just in case I do stay, but I'm not sure about him either. Dam it! I'm more mad about the fact that I didn't get tell him today, I thought it would be better to tell him in person, that's why I waited until tonight. There goes that plan. I'm so frustrated and confused where I'm almost ready to just call him and tell him just what I've been thinking!
The thing that's really getting to me is the fact that I told Jordan about all this already, I told him even though it's been complicated with Jake, he treats me right and he's there for me, this does not reflect the side of Jake I was talking about. I don't even know if I want to talk to him today or anymore, I still cold, I have to be, I might be frustrated, but I don't want to get hurt. This just suck to me!
Thursday, December 10, 2009
Great Day. :)
I talked to Jake last night, and you know what? He was so understanding, it was great, he said he was trying to make me feel uncomfortable or rush things, but he really likes going out with me, I like going out with him too, and he treats me right, so I like the way things are after all.: )
My last session for Monday, was rescheduled because of finals, so today was my final session. I felt great, it seems like she tries to pick at me to try to break me, but I’m not the same girl that first walked into that office, I was feeling great and strong, and for the first time since going there, I walked in and out unbroken and with a smile on my face. I’ve showed great progress, that’s what the counselor said, she’s kind of puzzled how strong I am; I feel so great and stronger than ever, I might go to a referral location just to keep me going strong, but I think I’m going to be fine, I feel fine. : )
I’m feeling the burn less in my abs area, however now my arms are torturing me! Still I don’t give up, and trust me, with the pain I’ve gone through, I’ve seriously considered it. I think I met Jake at a perfect time in my life, he’s gone through this, by looking at him, you can’t tell, but I’ve felt his abs and muscles in his arms. Wow! It’s cool, at least he doesn’t show off, I thought he was joking at first, like I said, you can’t really tell by looking at him; but yesterday he held me tight and that’s how I he was not lying. : )
Today was great and productive! I got up early despite being out late with Jake, or should I say, out early. : ) I think I did great on my math final, I finished, worked all the bonus questions, and had time to go over my answers, with still over an hour left. To my surprise, when I got out and headed to the Loftin, Jake was there waiting for me, we talked and worked out some more math problems, I felt so pumped even though we couldn’t figure them all out. He stayed a while before having to go to work, but it was nice, my friend Daniel was hanging with us, it was cool, but I think Jake was making him feel a little uncomfortable, he was just messing with him for laughs though; Daniel was checking this girl and Jake convinced him to go talk to her. :D They were talking and it seemed good, but Jake had to leave, I updated him later that they’re only going to be friends, because it turns out, she’s actually with one of his friends, oops…
I helped Daniel schedule his classes for next year and I chose mine as a backup just in case it comes down to it and I chose to stay, I’m still keeping my options open and looking for the best offer, so for now, I’ll have 15hours in the Spring. As part of my degree plan, I had to take either a dance or physic education class, I didn’t like the dance classes and the one was interested in was too early and too long, so I signed up for swimming, I figured, hey why not? Besides I have the body for it, I told Jake, and he wants to join it with me, man, wouldn’t that be something,?
Jake picked me up late yesterday after he got out of work, and we went to Jim’s. Big surprise, my mom was alright with it, she just told me to be careful, and not to forget my key, things have been great with my family lately, I finally feel like I have a family. : ) We ate first, I wasn’t that hungry and it was already late, Jake got out after 22, so I just had a drink and mozzarella sticks. ( I don’t eat that much anyways). Well, after eating we got down to studying for our math finals, poor Jake, he needed more help than I did. : ) We really got stumped on two problems, I joked with him that it was because of his chicken scratch notes. I didn't get home until after 2, and my mom was cool with it, she actually asked if I was going out again, tonight, nope. We were fighting with one stupid problem last night and today at school as well. It was nice seeing him at school today, he didn’t even have any classes today. : ) My sister’s in a different class, but taking the same course as Jake, so I asked her for help today, just one example and I got it, Jake called during “Power Hour” at work, and I told him, it was so funny how excited I got, tomorrow we’re going out on another “study date”, what, we actually study…for a while… ; )
I’m tired, I have work in the morning,, and another late “study date” with Jake, so really should be going to sleep soon. I was listening to Jake DJ on the radio, his third job (only once a week) he just got off the air at 1, I told him I would listen, thank God it’s only once a week, don’t get me wrong, he’s awesome, but I want to sleep, I think I can spare time to stay up once a week, but any more and I wouldn’t. So…until tomorrow, goodnight me, I doubt I even have any readers left, but oh well, this is a great way of releasing stress. : )
My last session for Monday, was rescheduled because of finals, so today was my final session. I felt great, it seems like she tries to pick at me to try to break me, but I’m not the same girl that first walked into that office, I was feeling great and strong, and for the first time since going there, I walked in and out unbroken and with a smile on my face. I’ve showed great progress, that’s what the counselor said, she’s kind of puzzled how strong I am; I feel so great and stronger than ever, I might go to a referral location just to keep me going strong, but I think I’m going to be fine, I feel fine. : )
I’m feeling the burn less in my abs area, however now my arms are torturing me! Still I don’t give up, and trust me, with the pain I’ve gone through, I’ve seriously considered it. I think I met Jake at a perfect time in my life, he’s gone through this, by looking at him, you can’t tell, but I’ve felt his abs and muscles in his arms. Wow! It’s cool, at least he doesn’t show off, I thought he was joking at first, like I said, you can’t really tell by looking at him; but yesterday he held me tight and that’s how I he was not lying. : )
Today was great and productive! I got up early despite being out late with Jake, or should I say, out early. : ) I think I did great on my math final, I finished, worked all the bonus questions, and had time to go over my answers, with still over an hour left. To my surprise, when I got out and headed to the Loftin, Jake was there waiting for me, we talked and worked out some more math problems, I felt so pumped even though we couldn’t figure them all out. He stayed a while before having to go to work, but it was nice, my friend Daniel was hanging with us, it was cool, but I think Jake was making him feel a little uncomfortable, he was just messing with him for laughs though; Daniel was checking this girl and Jake convinced him to go talk to her. :D They were talking and it seemed good, but Jake had to leave, I updated him later that they’re only going to be friends, because it turns out, she’s actually with one of his friends, oops…
I helped Daniel schedule his classes for next year and I chose mine as a backup just in case it comes down to it and I chose to stay, I’m still keeping my options open and looking for the best offer, so for now, I’ll have 15hours in the Spring. As part of my degree plan, I had to take either a dance or physic education class, I didn’t like the dance classes and the one was interested in was too early and too long, so I signed up for swimming, I figured, hey why not? Besides I have the body for it, I told Jake, and he wants to join it with me, man, wouldn’t that be something,?
Jake picked me up late yesterday after he got out of work, and we went to Jim’s. Big surprise, my mom was alright with it, she just told me to be careful, and not to forget my key, things have been great with my family lately, I finally feel like I have a family. : ) We ate first, I wasn’t that hungry and it was already late, Jake got out after 22, so I just had a drink and mozzarella sticks. ( I don’t eat that much anyways). Well, after eating we got down to studying for our math finals, poor Jake, he needed more help than I did. : ) We really got stumped on two problems, I joked with him that it was because of his chicken scratch notes. I didn't get home until after 2, and my mom was cool with it, she actually asked if I was going out again, tonight, nope. We were fighting with one stupid problem last night and today at school as well. It was nice seeing him at school today, he didn’t even have any classes today. : ) My sister’s in a different class, but taking the same course as Jake, so I asked her for help today, just one example and I got it, Jake called during “Power Hour” at work, and I told him, it was so funny how excited I got, tomorrow we’re going out on another “study date”, what, we actually study…for a while… ; )
I’m tired, I have work in the morning,, and another late “study date” with Jake, so really should be going to sleep soon. I was listening to Jake DJ on the radio, his third job (only once a week) he just got off the air at 1, I told him I would listen, thank God it’s only once a week, don’t get me wrong, he’s awesome, but I want to sleep, I think I can spare time to stay up once a week, but any more and I wouldn’t. So…until tomorrow, goodnight me, I doubt I even have any readers left, but oh well, this is a great way of releasing stress. : )
Tuesday, December 8, 2009
Slow down...
I saw Jake at school today, I was hanging out with Gabby, he wanted to meet up and she really wanted to meet him, so she went along with me. He doesn’t quite know Gabby’s kind of craziness, so he asked her if she was drunk, that was a bad thing to say, she had a bad weekend and wants to move on from that, not the greatest thing to say to her, oh well, he didn’t know and I wasn’t about to explain it, it’s not for me to tell him Gabby’s personal life.
Well, one things for sure, he is definitely no Jordan, he needed my help with math, I can do higher math, it’s just funny to me that Jake struggles with it. I’m going to help him study for his final and he’ll help me with mine as well. Here’s the thing, I like Jake, but I’m trying not to rush into things, I want us to date for a while and get to know each other more, Jake on the other hand, likes me a lot, he’s told so, and I can tell. I just don’t want to rush into something, I think things are kind of going fast as it is, but Jake’s not making it any easier, he’s been calling me his dork, I keep telling him, “Oh really, we’ll see about that,” his response, “What do you mean? I really like you, and you are my dork.” I know he means well and it’s kind of flattering that he feels this way so soon, but that the thing, it’s so soon.
We’re going to go out and study together tomorrow after he gets out of work, I’ll already be out too, so I think we need to talk about things, talk in person, I really like him too, but it seems like things are moving too fast. I just want to be sure this is what I want, I’m doing for myself now, I need to look out for myself and be sure. By the way, I’m still so freakin’ sore, I still worked out but it was not easy. : (
Well, one things for sure, he is definitely no Jordan, he needed my help with math, I can do higher math, it’s just funny to me that Jake struggles with it. I’m going to help him study for his final and he’ll help me with mine as well. Here’s the thing, I like Jake, but I’m trying not to rush into things, I want us to date for a while and get to know each other more, Jake on the other hand, likes me a lot, he’s told so, and I can tell. I just don’t want to rush into something, I think things are kind of going fast as it is, but Jake’s not making it any easier, he’s been calling me his dork, I keep telling him, “Oh really, we’ll see about that,” his response, “What do you mean? I really like you, and you are my dork.” I know he means well and it’s kind of flattering that he feels this way so soon, but that the thing, it’s so soon.
We’re going to go out and study together tomorrow after he gets out of work, I’ll already be out too, so I think we need to talk about things, talk in person, I really like him too, but it seems like things are moving too fast. I just want to be sure this is what I want, I’m doing for myself now, I need to look out for myself and be sure. By the way, I’m still so freakin’ sore, I still worked out but it was not easy. : (
Monday, December 7, 2009
Venting :(
Dam, having trouble sleeping, I have so many things in the back of my mind that I’ve been thinking about, I really need to vent and let out, timing sucks and than it doesn’t at the same time, because Jordan and I were planning my trip to go see him for Christmas and than he broke up with me, I had the best surprise for him, it just kind of sucks thinking of it, than again, maybe he didn’t even deserve it. (that’s how Gabby and Lucy have been encouraging me to think like lately) The Saturday after Jordan broke up with me I finally brought myself to unpack, that sucked, I had so many surprises he’ll never know about, I think it would probably drive him crazy knowing all the things I did for him, and would have, oh well, now what hell am I suppose to do with this stuff? Some things were for him, things which would have been useful, I know how he hates getting crap presents, so I had practical gifts in mind this year, some things he could have used everyday, I even had something for his mom, knowing her, I’m sure she would have loved it too, I thought of sending it to her, after all things were between Jordan and I not her, but why? I guess I’ll just figure out something to do with them. The thing that really drives me crazy is the fact that I actually had a few things planned, just for the two of us, one just for his enjoyment, that really sucks, I don‘t know what to do about that now, oh well. : (
I had a care package for him, that I was going to send out, and I was still thinking of sending it, but decided not to. I had been wanting hot chocolate for sometime now, why I didn’t think of it sooner? I open the package and had some hot chocolate along with some of the snacks I had packed, I’m taking care of myself now, I must admit though, I should eat too many treats if I really want to reach my goal. I had something for his B-day which I was going to send him ahead of time so it would be there the night before, I know he would have really liked that, screw it, its mine now, I like it too. Man! I don’t know, thinking of all this is sort of pissing me off, I did so much for us, for him, and he’ll never know, because while I was getting ready what was he doing? He was planning the trip with me, only to break up with me before it even happened, the crazy thing is, we even talked about me still going up even after breaking up, I am so much stronger than I was then, I probably would have still given him everything, but why? I know now that, that was a stupid and weak thing for me to think, he doesn‘t deserve any of the things I have to offer, he had no idea how lucky he was, I knew, that‘s the beauty of a surprise, the person being surprised never suspects a thing. I love surprises, but still, that really sucks! I guess I have really changed the way of looking at things, in my life, the crazy part about all of this, is how quickly I have adjusted to all of this, I am definitely not the same person that was broken just a week ago, but it still doesn’t change the past, I’m glad, things are kick ass for me right now, my life feels worth living for, it’s still crazy to me. : )
I had a care package for him, that I was going to send out, and I was still thinking of sending it, but decided not to. I had been wanting hot chocolate for sometime now, why I didn’t think of it sooner? I open the package and had some hot chocolate along with some of the snacks I had packed, I’m taking care of myself now, I must admit though, I should eat too many treats if I really want to reach my goal. I had something for his B-day which I was going to send him ahead of time so it would be there the night before, I know he would have really liked that, screw it, its mine now, I like it too. Man! I don’t know, thinking of all this is sort of pissing me off, I did so much for us, for him, and he’ll never know, because while I was getting ready what was he doing? He was planning the trip with me, only to break up with me before it even happened, the crazy thing is, we even talked about me still going up even after breaking up, I am so much stronger than I was then, I probably would have still given him everything, but why? I know now that, that was a stupid and weak thing for me to think, he doesn‘t deserve any of the things I have to offer, he had no idea how lucky he was, I knew, that‘s the beauty of a surprise, the person being surprised never suspects a thing. I love surprises, but still, that really sucks! I guess I have really changed the way of looking at things, in my life, the crazy part about all of this, is how quickly I have adjusted to all of this, I am definitely not the same person that was broken just a week ago, but it still doesn’t change the past, I’m glad, things are kick ass for me right now, my life feels worth living for, it’s still crazy to me. : )
Sunday, December 6, 2009
Feeling the burn...
I’m still thinking of my date with Jake, we had been working on studying for finals all day today, only taking a small break in between to text each other. Finally we got to talk, he called me, and when I answered, I got a pleasant greeting, ”Hello my beautiful dork.” Last night throughout the date he kept telling me how beautiful I am, not to sound conceded or anything, but I have been looking really hot lately. I have actually been keeping up with my workout schedule, I’ll admit, I’ve been struggling to keep it up, but my body has never looked better, I’m firmer pretty much everywhere, and my stomach actually has the little dividing lines, I really want to keep up with that, I’ve always been insecure with my stomach, but it’s looking great. I want to be able to wear a two piece this summer without feeling uncomfortable, I probably always could have, but I never felt comfortable with my body enough to do it. I can feel the burn more and more every time I workout, that’s a good sign, I’ve been slowly increasing my routine and I think that’s what’s helping.
I think it’s pretty awesome, Jake actually works out too, he’s not completely ripped, which is a good thing, I don’t like too much, I think I actually prefer a little something, but I can tell he works out, not to mention last night we were talking about it, he told me to feel his stomach, he’s on a four pack so far, that’s cool, I think he’s steps ahead, it’s nice, I‘ve never really kept up with myself enough to be this far. I think it‘s been about a little over four months, with short stops here and there, it‘s a miracle I was able to keep up with it even through my tough times, and now it‘s finally showing some pay off. : ) today we were talking about it more, because I was so sore, I told Jake, I’ve actually been feeling the burn for good while now it’s almost to the point that I want to stop. I just need to keep motivating myself, no stopping now, I’m this far and determined, after a while it should go away, right? I think that’s the way it work, feel the burn, that means its working., and boy do I feel the burn, its only been burning more and more. Jake thinks he could give me some tip on working out to get results faster, but I’m not sure I want to feel more burn than I already do.
I think it’s pretty awesome, Jake actually works out too, he’s not completely ripped, which is a good thing, I don’t like too much, I think I actually prefer a little something, but I can tell he works out, not to mention last night we were talking about it, he told me to feel his stomach, he’s on a four pack so far, that’s cool, I think he’s steps ahead, it’s nice, I‘ve never really kept up with myself enough to be this far. I think it‘s been about a little over four months, with short stops here and there, it‘s a miracle I was able to keep up with it even through my tough times, and now it‘s finally showing some pay off. : ) today we were talking about it more, because I was so sore, I told Jake, I’ve actually been feeling the burn for good while now it’s almost to the point that I want to stop. I just need to keep motivating myself, no stopping now, I’m this far and determined, after a while it should go away, right? I think that’s the way it work, feel the burn, that means its working., and boy do I feel the burn, its only been burning more and more. Jake thinks he could give me some tip on working out to get results faster, but I’m not sure I want to feel more burn than I already do.
My date with Jake :)
I went out with Jake! I was right, it was great! I was so nervous and excited before he came to pick me up. It’s kind of funny, I had to give him directions how to get to my house, I’m horrible with giving directions, but somehow I did it. He called me when he turned down a wrong street, but I helped him find his way, I told him to park in the front and I would come right out, and I did. I knew he had a truck, but I didn’t know what it looked like, when I came out I saw a normal size truck parked with it’s lights on, I got in and he starts laughing and said jokingly, “You didn’t know what my truck looked like, how did you know it was me? You’re crazy, just getting into a strangers truck.” Obviously it was the only one there waiting so I knew it had to be him. He had most of the date planned, he said he wanted to go to the Quarry and Diversions, but he wanted to take me to eat first, I really didn’t care, so on the drive we saw a Whataburger, he asked if I wanted to eat there, he hadn’t had it in a while, I agreed so our first stop, Whataburger, he got off quick and opened my door for me and gave me a big hug before we headed inside. We joked around with the guy at the register, I think he was kind of a newbie. There were only three others tables being used, one left after we went to sit down, three guys, including the one from the register came over to clean it, it was weird, it look like they kept checking on us. I noticed Jake's eyes were light blue again, so I asked him what color are his eyes, somehow he's not even sure. Jake is a fry monster, I told him that and he started talking like Cookie Monster, saying, “French fries,” a few times, I told him the last one sounded almost like Yota, he then changed his voice more like Yota saying, “Fries French.” I just could stop laughing, he is such a dork, score! After we finished eating we were talking for a while, somehow we got into some of his embarrassing childhood stories, they were funny, I guess he’s been crazy all his life. We decided to head out, it was so cold outside, but it was a nice warm drive.
As we were driving, it was non-stop joking back and fourth between us, he was pretending to be a tour guide pointing out these dumb little places, pretending they had history, and I pretended to believe him asking stupid questions, it was funny, that lasted a while then we both just couldn’t believe how dumb we were being. He decided on going to Diversions first, we talked about it and I told him that I hadn’t been there for a long time, I use to go there, I love arcade games, I’m suck a dork. Well, we talked a lot and then all of a sudden he reached for my hand, it fit! I use to tell Jordan how I noticed that holding hands never felt right with anyone before him, or during the time we broke up, it just seemed like no one’s hands fit with mine, besides Jordan, even Henry tried on our date, but I forgot to mention it since it too was a disappointment; so I was surprised that it felt so right, our hands fit together! That made me all kinds of happy. J Once again Jake opened the door for me, and we went in to play some games, he likes most of the same games as me, it was so funny, he almost beat me at air hockey, it’s okay, I warned him that usually win. We played Guitar Hero, and he killed us, it made me laugh that even my niece and nephew could play better. He rocks at shooting games, which is cool, because those are my favorite! He didn’t try the DDR but I did, I can never pass up DDR! We both placed in Area 51 and I found out his initials are J.W, weird, still won, placing 6, he was 9.
That was so much fun, we left and head to the Quarry, I hadn’t been there for a long either, it was so nice and peaceful since it was night, I bet it would be a nightmare during the day with the holiday season, Jake agrees. We walked around outside and sat on a bench talking, it was so cold! Even with my jacket on, I was freezing! Jake wasn’t even wearing a jacket, just a thermal shirt and t-shirt over, he saw how cold I was and started holding me, as we watched the lights, he liked my jacket, saying it was warm. We kept talking as he held me, and then he held one of my hands with the other still around me and he kissed me. Wow, wasn’t expecting that one. It was nice, then he held me some more, the warmth of my jacket made him realize he was getting cold, so we headed back to the truck for his jacket. Instead we got in and he drove us back around where we were sitting, leaving the heater on so we could both be warm, much better, I actually had to take off my jacket. We talked more, and he asked me to sit closer, I did, he held me and he kissed me some more, and I don’t know what happened, we just broke into a long make-out session, it was really good, we held each other tighter and he started rubbing his hands up and down my back, so I started running my finger through his hair, it was so soft! :D It was late, so we finally decided to leave, even though neither one of us really wanted to. He drove the long way home, and held my hand most of the way. I still can’t believe how much fun we had, it was so great, when we got to my house, he opened the door for me once again, he hugged and kissed me. It was so nice, by the time I got inside, it was exactly 1am. Oops.
As we were driving, it was non-stop joking back and fourth between us, he was pretending to be a tour guide pointing out these dumb little places, pretending they had history, and I pretended to believe him asking stupid questions, it was funny, that lasted a while then we both just couldn’t believe how dumb we were being. He decided on going to Diversions first, we talked about it and I told him that I hadn’t been there for a long time, I use to go there, I love arcade games, I’m suck a dork. Well, we talked a lot and then all of a sudden he reached for my hand, it fit! I use to tell Jordan how I noticed that holding hands never felt right with anyone before him, or during the time we broke up, it just seemed like no one’s hands fit with mine, besides Jordan, even Henry tried on our date, but I forgot to mention it since it too was a disappointment; so I was surprised that it felt so right, our hands fit together! That made me all kinds of happy. J Once again Jake opened the door for me, and we went in to play some games, he likes most of the same games as me, it was so funny, he almost beat me at air hockey, it’s okay, I warned him that usually win. We played Guitar Hero, and he killed us, it made me laugh that even my niece and nephew could play better. He rocks at shooting games, which is cool, because those are my favorite! He didn’t try the DDR but I did, I can never pass up DDR! We both placed in Area 51 and I found out his initials are J.W, weird, still won, placing 6, he was 9.
That was so much fun, we left and head to the Quarry, I hadn’t been there for a long either, it was so nice and peaceful since it was night, I bet it would be a nightmare during the day with the holiday season, Jake agrees. We walked around outside and sat on a bench talking, it was so cold! Even with my jacket on, I was freezing! Jake wasn’t even wearing a jacket, just a thermal shirt and t-shirt over, he saw how cold I was and started holding me, as we watched the lights, he liked my jacket, saying it was warm. We kept talking as he held me, and then he held one of my hands with the other still around me and he kissed me. Wow, wasn’t expecting that one. It was nice, then he held me some more, the warmth of my jacket made him realize he was getting cold, so we headed back to the truck for his jacket. Instead we got in and he drove us back around where we were sitting, leaving the heater on so we could both be warm, much better, I actually had to take off my jacket. We talked more, and he asked me to sit closer, I did, he held me and he kissed me some more, and I don’t know what happened, we just broke into a long make-out session, it was really good, we held each other tighter and he started rubbing his hands up and down my back, so I started running my finger through his hair, it was so soft! :D It was late, so we finally decided to leave, even though neither one of us really wanted to. He drove the long way home, and held my hand most of the way. I still can’t believe how much fun we had, it was so great, when we got to my house, he opened the door for me once again, he hugged and kissed me. It was so nice, by the time I got inside, it was exactly 1am. Oops.
Friday, December 4, 2009
From green to blue :)
I saw Jake at school today, I was heading to my class and he was as well, but he called that he wanted to see me, we decided to be late for our classes, besides, they were just review days, we met half way and went somewhere to talk. It was really nice, he is such a dork! :D I thought Jake’s eyes were blue, that’s what they looked like when we first met, but to my surprise, when I saw him today, they’re green! :D After my class he called again, asking where I was, I told him I was let out of my class early and was heading to my next class, but I had time, he told me to wait for him, that he was close, before I knew it, he was behind me. He hugged me and we talked outside on a balcony just outside the building of my next class. It was nice, I could see through the door, and I saw my professor pass through heading to class, he always get there about two minuet before class, so I knew I had to go, so Jake walked me inside, and we went our separate ways again. :) I have been talking to Jake more and more, I actually don’t call him, he calls me, so far our conversations have been short, because we both have school and work, I like it, I don’t want to be dependant on talking to him, I don’t want to fall for a voice, I need more, I deserve more than that. Jake asked me out the same night we first met, it will be tomorrow, he hasn’t forgotten, he‘s going to plan it, he’s been throwing ideas out there, but we‘ll see how it turns out. I think it will be great, he seems really cool, and we have a lot in common. I’m not going to let myself do anything I don’t want to do, so I want to go out with him, it’s not just because I can, I want to, and I think it will be great! :)
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
